Hello, I'm your pod-doctor for today, just levitate this way please.

The downside of last week was an ear infection. I went to an Ear, Nose and Throat Clinic in a hospital that Kogo recommended to me, which was a Sci-Fi meets playschool experience.

I had to undergo a couple of (I think largely pointless) tests on my hearing and ear pressure. The woman who gave me the ear pressure test gave me this thing that looked like a black plastic paraffin can with an oval bobble on top. I had to shove the bobble into my nostril while she stuck something else in my ear. At one point I really had to suppress my desire to laugh. Her instructions don't sound quite as ridiculous in English as they do in Japanese, but you get the gist if you imagine her talking to me as though I were a child.

"Now when I count to 3, try to gulp as best as you can... 1...2...3... GULP!"
"Good, well done! And again... give it your best!!"

After that, when I finally got to see the doctor, my name and the room number I had to go to was called out over a loudspeaker. I then walked into this corridor that was like something out of Star Trek and a door slides open to reveal a doctor sitting in a room that I like to think of as a kind of pod. He even had one of those shiny metallic discs strapped to his forehead. He was really very professional and good about everything though. I have a perforation in my left eardrum, which he suggests I should have a minor operation for. We'll see: I hear from other people that medicine can make it heal, and I'd like a second doctor's opinion. I'm not in any pain at all, which is a relief because I thought that burst eardrums were supposed to be the most painful things on earth. But the sense of unease that comes with it isn't great.

By the way, I reckon my eardrum was perforated when I came back to Tokyo on the bullet train. I was listening to my iPod and and suddenly the sound in my left ear started to drown out and pressure built up and my ear popped really painfully. Looking back, I know I don't listen to my iPod loud at all, so it can't have been that, and since bullet trains aren't pressurized like planes, I didn't think that was anything to do with it either. But since then both Tom and Emily have told me they have had problems with their ears whilst listening to their iPods on the train.

I'm not surprised that my eardrum ruptured in this case - I have slightly weaker eardrums than most people because of problems I had with my ears when I was a kid. But as for the dangers of listening to your iPod on the bullet train, remember you heard it here first!